Why do I keep coming back to the Internet?

The road curves southwest, and a line of hills rises up over the horizon as I make my way nearer to them. Soon I'll be able to see the remains of an old watch tower. At least, I'd be able to see it if it existed. It's actually a place in Tolkien's Middle Earth - one of the milestones along the way in the Eowyn Challenge's "Walk to Rivendell" challenge. Several years ago that challenge was my sole motivator to exercise. I logged my miles daily and used to put in countless hours walking on the treadmill just to make it to my destination faster than the other participants. After a year or two of walking alone, I signed up for the message board and received support, motivation, and inspiration from many other participants. After a while, my participation lagged. I graduated college, and although I continued running, walking, and biking, it was sporadically. I didn't log the miles, and I've long since forgotten my message-board login information. I have kept coming back to the Internet, though, for running motivation and information.

The Internet can be a pretty scary place. It provides an anonymity that people often use when they want to say that most hurtful, prejudiced, and downright offensive things. Just browse some comments following newspaper articles or even the comments about YouTube videos and tell me that you won't find some serious haters exploiting the First Amendment. And then there is the huge privacy risk associated with using the Internet. I am reluctant to reveal personal data about myself on this blog or anywhere online because it is so out there for absolutely anyone to find, whether they be employers or identity theives.

So why do I put my thoughts out there on this blog?

Because at the same time that I resent the way that the Internet provides a mask for hatred to hide behind, or that I fear too much private information being made public, I really value how the Internet has connected me with people across the globe with whom I share similar interests. When the people "out there" are inspiring you or providing information or holding discussions about topics that you just can't have with your regular circle of friends, they become an example of the best that the Internet has to offer. I've corresponded with running bloggers across the U.S. from the east coast to the west, from the great plains to Alaska, and outside the states from Canada to Vietnam. Each person has a unique perspective that broadens my horizons.

I recently joined dailymile.com, a social networking site for runners and cyclists. Coming from the Eowyn Challenge background, I was excited to see that members post challenges for themselves and each other and are constantly supportive of each other along the way. I haven't taken on a challenge yet, but I'm looking forward to doing so. If you're interested in joining, it's a nifty tool for keeping track of workouts, and it has some fun features, like a meter of how many televisions your total mileage could have powered, or how many donuts you've burned. Most of the people who participate in dailymile are highly motivated and will not only motivate you, but keep you to your word if you take on a challenge.

As for the Eowyn Challenge, I no longer participate in it as a group activity by posting my progress on the site or by corresponding with other participants, but it has become a deeply personal and meaningful part of my training and motivation. The purpose of the challenge - to break free of the cages imposed by negative self esteem and body image - will always be part of my journey, so every once in a while I tally up my miles and find out where I am in Middle Earth. I know that at the same time that I'm approaching the watch tower of Amon-Sul, there are runners elsewhere following parallel personal journeys, and it's good company to keep.

So you can say that this public blog, with all of the personal meaning in its Eowyn Challenge roots, represents an ironic blend of public and private. When you think about how the public element has helped shape what I feel personally, though, it's not that surprising an irony.

When I started writing this post, it reminded me of a good friend I had a few years ago who participated in the Eowyn Challenge with me. She moved and we fell out of touch, but she just reconnected with me on facebook. Just another example, I guess, of the Internet's ironic blend of public and private, and why I do keep coming back to the Internet, despite its faults.

Coyotes and bears, oh my!

Miles: 7
Pace: 10:45?
Total miles: 7.5

I knew when I got up this morning that I wanted to go for a long run. I had to attend a Friends of the Library meeting tonight, so I was working the late shift and had all morning to myself. I decided to run on the trail, although it was a difficult decision for me. My mom told me that she saw a coyote in the backyard at 5:30 PM yesterday. I was kind of freaked out that it was out in the daylight, and I didn't really want to run around my house. Then again, it would probably make more sense to run on the road in a residential area than on a trail in the middle of the woods. But, the sun was strong, and I preferred the idea of running in the shade of the trail, and the surface was softer and flatter, so I went for the trail. As I was debating all of this, it occurred to me that it would be great if I had someone to run with. My usual running buddy (who just ran her first half-marathon on June 20th), is recuperating from a foot injury that she got during her training, and she'll be resting for at least the next month. The thought occurred to me then to start a local running club. I don't know if I will pursue it, but it was a thought. It would be so nice to have a group of people I could call for company (and protection) on a run.

It figures that, once I did get on the trail (at least, a mile and a half down it), what did I come across, but a bear crossing the path. I actually saw two walkers ahead of me stop and pull out their cameras, so I knew something was up, and then I noticed the black shape ambling across the path into the brush on the right. It looked small to me, and I was afraid of coming across its mother, but one of the walkers said that it looked at least a year old and that there probably wasn't a mother taking care of it, so I cautiously continued. It's been a long time since I came across a bear on the trail, and I ended up talking to myself for the rest of the run as a way of announcing myself to any creatures that I might meet.

My bear encounter reminded me of the Eowyn Challenge's Walk to Rivendell: when I first began the Walk, I likened the bears to Black Riders. Black, scary things lurking in the woods... The Walk was also what got me into running longer distances. I would go for long walks on the weekends at college, and after a few miles, my legs would just start itching to go faster and break into a run. I finally got into a schedule where I'd walk a mile and a half to a bike path, run four miles on the path, and then walk a mile and a half back, for a grand total of seven -- which is what I did today.

It's been exciting and confidence-building to run longer and longer distances. The point of the Eowyn Challenge was to break free of the cages imposed on us by weight, health, and/or self-esteem, and my journey has definitely helped me to do that. I never thought that I could run 7 miles without walking, but today I did, and next week I'll go even further. I plan on running in some more 5Ks this year, with the hopes of breaking my PR, and I'm going to sign up for a 10K in September, to try something new. I don't want to get stuck in the mindset that I can't do something.

"What do you fear, lady?" he asked. "A cage," she said. "To stay behind bars, until use and old age accept them, and all chance of doing great deeds is gone beyond recall or desire." -J.R.R Tolkien's Return of the King

The Eowyn Challenge

In August 2003, at the height of "Lord of the Rings" movie hype, I came across a website called the Eowyn Challenge. The challenge was to set and reach fitness goals with the support of other LOTR fans. The main event of the challenge was called the "The Walk to Rivendell", which entailed walking, running, biking, etc. for 458 miles, the equivalent of the distance from Hobbiton to Rivendell in Middle Earth. Over 5 years -- and several thousand miles -- later, I am still on the road to Rivendell, setting new goals and challenges. I began by walking, and eventually I got back into running, which I had all but abandoned in the year preceding my discovery of the Challenge. Now I've run in three 5Ks, and my current challenge is a 4-mile trail run in a few days.

I began training for this race a little over three weeks ago. At that time, I had planned for sprint workouts and long runs incorporated into my training. First the weather didn't cooperate, and then, on my first sprint workout, I hurt myself, despite a careful warm-up before the sprints. That set me back a lot. I've done a couple of 4-mile runs over the past few weeks, but my usual every-day run is only 2 miles. I'm averaging about 8-minute miles on those runs, and I hope I can hold that pace for the full 4 miles. I am going to run another 2 miles tomorrow and just walk on the next two days before the race. No matter how I do in this race, I hope to continue running consistently throughout the winter, when I usually slack off.